Sara @ Moonrize

Can change your life, right?  How do people not know this.  I, myself, am not a good writer and this is something I can say with absolute certainty.  However, the other side of that coin is that I can absolutely say that I crave the well written word like plants crave the sun.  Not even the well written word…but the written word. In the most unlikely places I can find the map to deciphering my thoughts and my own emotions.  And sometimes…I can find a piece of the map to the person I eventually want to be.

Tonight I read a book, a fiction piece.  It wasn’t a very original storyline or even particularly WELL written but man did it pack a punch. Its called “B as in beauty” and it’s punch lie in the insight.  Made, somehow, more insightful by the fact that it was written by a man.  Now, before you say that’s sexist let me explain two things.  First. Yep, sexist.  Second, the insight that tossed my on my butt was in a womans thoughts.  A man was able to completely jump right into my head and have his character react in a way that put words to my feelings.  Creepy and hot all at the same time.  He touched my thoughts (and well, me) on subjects from weight, to God, to sex, and an over packed schedule.  He nailed me on my guilt (who knows if its Latin guilt or daughter guilt….) and what I find that validates me.

He’s probably a woman trapped in a man’s body. Whatever. I loved that book.

More than loving the book though…I love that I love the written word. I love that I understand its power and that I can be provoked and comforted at the same time by these little words all strung together.

Reading rocks, ya’ll.

After a month living in just one house instead of two….life is calming down. I’ve been at the CNA job for almost 90 days now….i’ve gotten the 2nd job under control (only one day a week) and school is falling in line. We – as a family – are feeling more cohesive. Life is running smoother. Gary and I are doing *really* well with our ‘Dave Ramsey-ing’ (using cash and sticking to a budget) so in a few months, as long as we stay on track, we’ll have a healthy savings account and be able to DO more.

I have more time now to focus more on friends and social stuff. Its been a while, I think. It makes me sad that I feel like my friends have been living this whole time without me around! Not that I begrudge them lives…i’m just sad to miss out on them!

So for June, my resolution is to spend more time with friends and family. Be the friend I want to have. Re-focus on quality of life and not just survival (socially speaking). As well as ride my bike 2 times a week. July will be three. August will be four. I miss my bike!! Its still at the other house, I need to bring it over.

We’ve been at the new house for two weeks now…and we arent completely out of the old house…but life is good. I’m not super cramped and living with Mom is SO worth it. She’s been so much more relaxed since she has quit working and its really nice to see her “blooming”. We, Gary and I are a little cramped in our room but to be fair, we arent IN it much.

Between my two jobs, moving the old house, his job, sharing a car, school and trying to have a social life, we arent around a ton. Mom has been doing the majority of the housework and the cooking and such…so it makes it nice for me to focus on career and school.

Shortly after starting my job as a CNA…my knee started killing me on a pretty regular basis. No kidding, right? I went from sitting on my butt 9 hours a day to RUNNING 9 hours a day. So, i’ve gone to the different doctors and it turns out that I have a pretty serious knee condition. I have bone on bone in my right knee. Not so good. And there is nothing they can do about it. I got real worried about my choosing to pro sue nursing when my knee hurts all the time and will – forever.

After doing some more research, I think i’m going to be okay. I have to believe – because I truly believe that God has called me to nursing – that it will be okay. Besides…the nurses at work are on their feet WAY less than the CNA’s are.

So this summer will be spent settling into the new house, the new house mates, cleaning out the other house, settling into my jobs and school. And my tan…gotta work on my tan.